No matter how much I plan on keeping up with my blogging, I unfortunately allow life to get in my way and stop me from reaching whatever blogging goals I may have set for myself.
And sometimes I just have a hard time coming up with the motivation to even start the process of blogging. I myself am an emotional writer. I can only seem to get my best post out when I’m emotionally charged about something. Let alone be heartache, disappointment or a new love interest. I can’t seem to just sit down and write about something that isn’t overwhelming me at that current moment. And it’s not that I think anything is bad about being an emotional writer. It’s just that it doesn’t always help me when I want to keep post coming consistently on my blog. I’m emotional but damn it if I’m going to write EVERYTIME I get upset lol…I’m sure readers don’t want to read about how I plan on killing the last guy that played me. But then again some may, but if I ever did decide to I wouldn’t want my readers snitching on me…not that any of you would…Hmmm never mind this conversation.
What I’m trying to say is that I SUCK at consistency when it comes to my blog, if you’ve been keeping up with it…you know this…I know this, so let’s just get over it. Now the fun part…I’m trying to get paid…the not so fun part…I’m trying to get paid for my writing/blogging. And that’s where I’m stuck at currently. How does one go about getting paid? Will I have to talk about shit I really don’t care about? Will I have to become one of those Lifestyle/Beauty Bloggers to really see some coins? I have a slight idea of the answer for all these questions…I just don’t think I’ve come to terms with all the answers. I’m no beauty/style blogger…honestly I really don’t give two fucks about that dress and makeup that you’re wearing that the last 5 beauty/style bloggers also posted about. But I do like makeup and I do like cute clothes I just don’t like feeling like I have to post about it every day all the time just to gain readers and sponsorships. Plus most of those beauty shit these bloggers are feeding us are A) full of shit I wouldn’t want on my skin and B) Hella expensive for no damn reason yo.
Which is another reason why I haven’t been posting…a bitch is BROKE…BROKEN and HATEFUL lol. And that’s just me keeping it 100% real. I was unemployed for three months starting this past March. And before I up and left I was working for an evil ass cable company that paid well but literally sucked my whole soul and sanity out from me. I never knew how much I could hold my tongue until I worked there. After dealing with crazy, unpleasant and straight up rude customers I decided that my time in customer service jobs had to come to an end. I could no longer in my 30’s allow myself to deal with the abuse and the lack of employee appreciation that came with these type of jobs. So after my 31st birthday I came back from visiting my sister in Memphis and put my two weeks in. I didn’t really tell anyone, I had no real plan and financially I was in no place to leave such a good paying job. All I knew was that I had to get out before I wrote down one of these nasty ass customer’s address down and came to their cribs and squared up with them. That’s how bad it had gotten for me.
*long sigh* I’m legit having an emotional flashback as I type about that place. So I quit told everyone I had it all under control (LIES) and I left with some of my dignity intact, but I had no idea what was in stored for me while I was unemployed. I honestly thought I would find a job right away, because I was able to get call backs for interviews during my last two weeks. Unfortunately even though I got great feed backs from the interviews it wouldn’t be until June that I finally got an interview and a job offer. But because I really didn’t have any real financial plans before I quit my last job, I’m playing catch up with my money since I’ve started my new job. The job is great but I haven’t been able to fully enjoy all the benefits it offer because I’ve been so worried about making sure everything is paid for and caught up. But come August thankfully I can start enjoying my weekends off and my nice day shift. Also did I mention that I really don’t have to be bothered by anyone. I mainly just sit in my office, answer scheduling calls and write/eat/watch reality shows and read blogs. It’s definitely not my best paying job, but it’s extremely less stressful than any job I’ve had before. Now don’t get me wrong it’s no walk in the park kind of job. It has its challenges, and because I’m the first person to fill this position it has its days when I’m just like “Bish Wut?”lol. But I’m stress free and that’s a pretty awesome feeling. Also being stress free means I have time and the mental space to blog again without being emotionally stressed out.
So yeah back to my blog, I still have tons of ideas for my blog and things I hope to bring on here. But instead of stressing over setting a strict schedule of when and what time I post on here, I’m just going to let it flow organically. I still want to keep up with my personal post, but I’ve been asked to start posting some of my beauty/makeup tips and talk about some of my favorite makeup items as well as some other “lifestyle” post. But what I hope not to do is turn this into another typical lifestyle/beauty/fashion blog.
So if you actually read this to the end, I apologize that this post was so damn long…but I thank you…”You’re Loyal” lol. Until next time…
Peace Yinz Guys.